My Battle with Our Alarm

Our alarm at our house is not my friend. Not really even an acquaintance. We don't even like each other. We tolerate each other because we must see each other at least once a day. I am sure we all know people like that. But this is an ALARM. And ALARM hates me right back. I swear the ALARM is plotting against me everyday. 

Which brings me to my reason (one of many) why I hate ALARM. 

I hate ALARM because no matter what I do, it goes off. Not every time I try to set it or turn it off, but only the times when I am in a hurry, coming home really quick to grab something....AKA the times when I just need it to work. 

Ryan set up our alarm as soon as we got into the new house. The man came, albeit, 3 hours late, (but who's counting!) to set it up. He gave us a little lesson on how to set it, and I listened. But little did I know that as The man was bringing our little ALARM to life, the ALARM began planning it's destruction of my life. The man told us that if it goes off, the alarm company will call one number. We set this to Ryan's cell phone. So if it goes off, Ryan has to be with his phone, and answer it and give them our password. Which is....just kidding. Ha.

Now I am sure you are thinking, and I would be, too, what could this alarm do to you? Well, I am going to tell you, and brace yourself. 

Typical weeknight. Ryan wants to go to the Gym and play volleyball. I want to go grocery shopping, to the bank and run a few other errands. Ryan insists that we will go to the gym, and then do those things. Okay, I think. Not my first choice, but I can work out for an bit while he plays volleyball. We go to the gym, he begins his "bump-set-spike" routine all of us former volleyball players know. I go get on the treadmill, reluctantly trying to keep my New Years resolution. After about thirty minutes, Ryan comes and tells me that he is sorry, but they are not going to start playing until 8. I say that's okay, I will just go to the store by myself. He says fine, and I leave him there stretching and such. 

I get in the car, and realize that I have left my purse at home. I go home to get it, open the door and turn off the ALARM. I leave the door open and grab my purse, come back to the door and try to re-set the ALARM. ALARM begins wailing like a small child in the Nursery who just wants to sit in church with his Mom. I panic. Ryan is not here! He has his phone! I begin frantically calling him. He is not answering, because HE IS PLAYING VOLLEYBALL. 

I hop back in my car and race to the gym, frantically calling Ryan and praying he will answer. I have then become THAT wife. The wife who rushes into a volleyball scrimmage and says "RYAN! I NEED YOU!" He runs to me and I tell him that I set off the alarm and he didn't answer his phone and the police are probably coming! 

Now I bet you are getting bored with this story, but it is about to get interesting. 

He tells me to go home immediately and tell the police it was a false alarm. I race home, and pull in behind the police in front of our house. I get out and hurry to the door. 

"Ma'am,  is that 1310 you are going into?"

"Yes, sir. It is my house."

"Well, step back, because we have a break in."

"No, that's me!"

"That's you?"

"No, I set off the alarm and my husband was at the gym and he has the phone and I had to go tell him to answer his phone and come back and tell you that it is a false alarm!"

"Calm down, ma'am. It's okay. Can I just see your license?"

"Sure. "

I hand him my license, and he goes back to check to see if my car is stolen. I am pretty frazzled, and very embarrassed. His partner tells me that it's okay, and they give me my license back and start to leave. We laugh and say it has been "just one of those days".  Sure. I think. Just get me outta here.

I then walk to my front door, and get out my keys. This is not a usual thing, because typically we go in the house through the garage. I CAN'T GET THE KEY TO TURN. The police are in their car and I look like I am still trying to break into the house. 

Luckily, they left. I went around to the back and got in. 

Needless to say, I have set of the ALARM since then. And ALARM hates me. And I hate our ALARM. 

Much love, 

Allison