I've Learned My Lesson....

A few weeks ago, I went to my first book signing/reading with one of my favorite authors, Jennifer Weiner. Before you giggle, let me tell you that it is pronounced "wy-ner". I got there 40 minutes early and it was almost full. I really enjoyed hearing her talk about her book, writing, and funny stories about meeting celebrities, and her gay mom. She made me laugh several times. Because I bought my book at another store (forgive me for actually wanting to read it before I met the author....grrr), I had to wait for over an hour to meet her. 

When I finally got up to the front of the line, I told her that I really loved the book. I also told her that  her "Little Earthquakes" was my favorite book. She was nice and went on to the next person. I looked down at my signing as I left and it said "Allison, Enjoy! Jennifer Weiner" Enjoy? ENJOY? I just told you I read the book! Why would you write ENJOY? 

Then I reached my second disappointment of the evening. I saw the picture I took. Okay, take a look, and then I will tell you why it is so awful. 

My Husband stared and laughed at it for a good ten minutes. I have the longest fingers ever and I have awkwardly placed them right over her name. I have learned my lesson. Ryan made me hold a few books to practice, just in case I ever go to a book signing again.

I guess on the plus side, my arms look good.

At any rate, it was fun, I liked meeting her, in case she ever reads this.....which I doubt she will.

Allison Harms, Animal Rescue

Lately I have been saving small creatures left and right. It is becoming a pattern! Here's why....

Last Friday I was driving down Allen Heights, which is a street in Allen (Duh. I don't know why I just wrote that). I noticed on the other side of the road, a sweet turtle was trying to cross! I instantly needed to save this turtle. I pulled into the nearest neighborhood and took off running down the sidewalk. As I am coming close, I see a car coming and I almost lose it. I cannot stand to see this little turtle get squashed. Luckily, the car slowed down and waited for the turtle to cross, and then drove off. (Insert your best "Why did the turtle cross the road" joke here.) I then ran over, grabbed the little turtle, who instantly went in his shell, and put him in the woods by the side of the road, just before another car speed by. Phew. 

The other day at the gym I was on the elliptical, which faces the pond outside the recreation center. Which, by the way, is really nice. It is so peaceful to watch bunnies hop and ducks swim while you work out. But, I digress. So I am working out, and I notice these children running around. No big deal, right? Then, I see that they are THROWING ROCKS at the new BABY DUCKS the park just celebrated. I hop off my elliptical (interrupting a great workout, by the way) and go to the front desk at the gym. I asked the receptionist man (nicely) if I needed to stop the kids outside from throwing rocks at baby ducks. He told me not to worry, and that he would get them to stop. He did. Phew. Baby ducks at the park can live in peace for another day. I mean seriously...throwing rocks at ducks? Where are your parents? Were you born in a barn? 

Also, to complete my animal rescues, I save bunnies and birds from the wrath of my dog on our daily walks. She has discovered that birds and bunnies would be really fun to chase, and if she sees one, I better hold on, because she takes off pretty forcefully. 

Maybe tomorrow I will save a squirrel. Who knows? Or a stray kitten. 

Much love, 

Allison

Nostalgic for Disney

I watched this movie recently to "preview it

for a Children's Ministry event."

Whatever. I just wanted to watch it.

Did I mention that I used to dance all over the house

singing this? Don't worry, I was like, 6...

Much love,

Allison

Ode to IKEA...and banana bread.

We love IKEA!

Now, growing up, I never knew the glory that is IKEA. We didn't have an IKEA in Edmond. Also, even if we did, I don't think we would have bought furniture to assemble. It takes a LOT of patience. But that was then, and this is now....

Okay, so my husband and I love IKEA. We like their hotdogs, too. Okay, we LOVE their hotdogs. Now I love a trip to IKEA, and Ryan tolerates it. We have a good time. 

So we picked out this dresser and end tables that we liked a couple months ago on one of our many trips. After several trips, measuring them, researching them, etc....we decided we wanted them. But we knew that if we bought them, we had to put them together. How hard can it be, right? 

I should also mention that as we were loading the 2 huge boxes onto our cart, a nice couple stopped and said they have the dresser and that they love it. Which is always nice to hear when you are about to make a big purchase. How long did it take you to put it together? We ask. Oh about an hour, they say. THEY LIED. 

Note: I am kicking myself right now for not taking a picture of all the screws, boards, panels, etc. that we had to go through last night to assemble this. Our entire living room was covered in tools and parts. 

3 and a half hours later.... 

Are you ready? Here it is.....

Isn't she pretty? 

Now all we have left is the end tables. Those should be a piece of cake after the dresser! Right...??

Much love, 

Allison

In other news, I made banana bread! I used to make it all the time, but I haven't in several months. But for some reason, this loaf was extra great. Maybe absence makes the heart grow fonder....or I just did it right this time....

I might be becoming Anti-LOST.

No, I am not going to try to not get lost in my life. Well, I guess everyone should do that. But I am talking about the TV show Lost. Ryan and I are watching Lost currently, and I cannot get into it. 

Now, I know a lot of people like Lost. I am not "hating" as the kids say. (Did I just say the kids? Maybe I am getting old.) I understand that people enjoy the show. And I still am watching it, so I must like something in it. Right? Something is making me tune in. Or maybe it is just loyalty. 

When Ryan and I first got married, we were both unemployed and so we rented the first two seasons of Lost and watched them all in a matter of weeks. It was awesome! I loved it. I was invested. 

As the seasons have gone on, I have come to find the show incredibly frustrating. I just don't get it sometimes, and I have watched it from the beginning. I mean, come on. SPOILER ALERT: Don't read on if you are not caught up. 

Really, black smoke that changes people? A bright light that changes the date and makes you mad? Random nose bleeds? Ben is "good" now? 

I just don't get it. But I will probably keep watching. There is room on the DVR. 

Much love, 

Allison

My Battle with Our Alarm

Our alarm at our house is not my friend. Not really even an acquaintance. We don't even like each other. We tolerate each other because we must see each other at least once a day. I am sure we all know people like that. But this is an ALARM. And ALARM hates me right back. I swear the ALARM is plotting against me everyday. 

Which brings me to my reason (one of many) why I hate ALARM. 

I hate ALARM because no matter what I do, it goes off. Not every time I try to set it or turn it off, but only the times when I am in a hurry, coming home really quick to grab something....AKA the times when I just need it to work. 

Ryan set up our alarm as soon as we got into the new house. The man came, albeit, 3 hours late, (but who's counting!) to set it up. He gave us a little lesson on how to set it, and I listened. But little did I know that as The man was bringing our little ALARM to life, the ALARM began planning it's destruction of my life. The man told us that if it goes off, the alarm company will call one number. We set this to Ryan's cell phone. So if it goes off, Ryan has to be with his phone, and answer it and give them our password. Which is....just kidding. Ha.

Now I am sure you are thinking, and I would be, too, what could this alarm do to you? Well, I am going to tell you, and brace yourself. 

Typical weeknight. Ryan wants to go to the Gym and play volleyball. I want to go grocery shopping, to the bank and run a few other errands. Ryan insists that we will go to the gym, and then do those things. Okay, I think. Not my first choice, but I can work out for an bit while he plays volleyball. We go to the gym, he begins his "bump-set-spike" routine all of us former volleyball players know. I go get on the treadmill, reluctantly trying to keep my New Years resolution. After about thirty minutes, Ryan comes and tells me that he is sorry, but they are not going to start playing until 8. I say that's okay, I will just go to the store by myself. He says fine, and I leave him there stretching and such. 

I get in the car, and realize that I have left my purse at home. I go home to get it, open the door and turn off the ALARM. I leave the door open and grab my purse, come back to the door and try to re-set the ALARM. ALARM begins wailing like a small child in the Nursery who just wants to sit in church with his Mom. I panic. Ryan is not here! He has his phone! I begin frantically calling him. He is not answering, because HE IS PLAYING VOLLEYBALL. 

I hop back in my car and race to the gym, frantically calling Ryan and praying he will answer. I have then become THAT wife. The wife who rushes into a volleyball scrimmage and says "RYAN! I NEED YOU!" He runs to me and I tell him that I set off the alarm and he didn't answer his phone and the police are probably coming! 

Now I bet you are getting bored with this story, but it is about to get interesting. 

He tells me to go home immediately and tell the police it was a false alarm. I race home, and pull in behind the police in front of our house. I get out and hurry to the door. 

"Ma'am,  is that 1310 you are going into?"

"Yes, sir. It is my house."

"Well, step back, because we have a break in."

"No, that's me!"

"That's you?"

"No, I set off the alarm and my husband was at the gym and he has the phone and I had to go tell him to answer his phone and come back and tell you that it is a false alarm!"

"Calm down, ma'am. It's okay. Can I just see your license?"

"Sure. "

I hand him my license, and he goes back to check to see if my car is stolen. I am pretty frazzled, and very embarrassed. His partner tells me that it's okay, and they give me my license back and start to leave. We laugh and say it has been "just one of those days".  Sure. I think. Just get me outta here.

I then walk to my front door, and get out my keys. This is not a usual thing, because typically we go in the house through the garage. I CAN'T GET THE KEY TO TURN. The police are in their car and I look like I am still trying to break into the house. 

Luckily, they left. I went around to the back and got in. 

Needless to say, I have set of the ALARM since then. And ALARM hates me. And I hate our ALARM. 

Much love, 

Allison

What I love about Halloween. . .

Here are a few things I love about Halloween and Fall. . . 

1. Candy Corn. I adore Candy Corn. And this year I was introduced to Caramel Apple Candy Corn, which I love! The only thing annoying about Candy Corn is that every time I eat some, someone tells me to eat it with peanuts, cause "It tastes like a Payday!" This got really old this Halloween season. If I want a Payday, I will get one. Sheesh. 

2. Little children in their costumes. So cute! I mean how cute are two sisters dressed as Dorothy and Toto? At the Fall Festival at church this year, I saw some of the cutest costumes I have ever seen. Ok, maybe not ever, because Kelsey, Denise and myself as a Lion, Tiger and Bear (Oh my!) when we were little was REALLY cute. Really cute. 

This is my sister, Kelsey. I am sure she will love that I posted this!

3. Colder weather. At 6:30 in the morning, when I walk the dog (long story), I don't love this. Not so much. But when I get to wear my green peacoat out and my fleece around the apartment, I love the cold. It is nice to wear boots, sweaters and old college sweatshirts. Which, let's face it, I shouldn't have bought so many of. 

4. My dog in her Halloween costume. Love it. 

Happy Fall, y'all!

Much love, 

Allison

The decline of the Gap.

When I was in High School, I worked at the Gap. High school and some of college. I met one of my first boyfriends there. I spent the majority of my paycheck on sweaters, jeans, etc with my amazing discount. I loved it. And you know what, I like to think Gap loved me too. They gave me a little pin and a certificate that said I had worked their over a year. They had to love me, right?

But now the reason for this post. The Gap has lost its magic. At least for me. I used to not be able to enter a Gap without at least one purchase. On a side note, I loved to go in and see my old friends at the Quail Springs Mall, shop and they would tell me who was still there and what all the sales were. It was great fun. But now that I have moved, there are no friends there, and there is no cute items to buy! They are all too expensive and just not cute. I don't even like going there. It is loud, and just not my favorite place anymore. It is very sad, but I must say it: RIP Gap. I shall go to Old Navy now. And probably Target. I love Target.

A time for change...

My life has changed drastically over the past month or so. I changed jobs, got a puppy and started reading novels again. Ok, that last one is not a big deal, but I needed a third one. 

1. I changed jobs. I moved out of my school and my education field into a Children's Ministry position at my church. And so far, this is one of the best decisions I have every made. Fo real. I like it. I spent the morning organizing puppet skits. Seriously. Be jealous. 

2. I got a puppy. Who is now huge. And occupies my life with her supreme cuteness. My goal is to bring her to work and let her roam and play with the ministers. Yeah right...but I can dream!

3. I started reading novels again. Which rules. In fact, I may write my own. Be on the lookout! 

Much love, 

Allison

What is new about me?

I have come to the conclusion that marriage and growing up really changes you. Yeah, you are thinking, well duh. Which reminds me you don't get a lot of "duh" these days. Anyways! I feel like a different person. A better person. Here is what is different about me.

I cry at 'The Bachelor":
Yes, at the Bachelor. Ok, don't laugh. But really. Years ago, I would never have cried at a reality TV show. But sometimes, now, when I watch it, I get a little misty. I am just more emotional when it comes to love. I see a couple get married on the TODAY show and I can't stop crying. I can't decide if this change is a good thing or not.

I feel more creative:
I feel like now, if could go back to school, I would be an awesome music major. I would be more creative. I know it! Cause now, I love to write songs. Yes, most are for my elementary students, but it happens. I also like to paint. And scrapbook. Scrapbook? Heck yes.

I cook and bake:
Growing up, I had no interest in this. In college...I still had no interest in cooking and making cupcakes. But my need to keep busy during the summer juxstaposed with my need to make my husband say "yum" has made me like to cook. I have made a cake with two layers, cookies of all kinds, cupcakes, wings, ribs, chicken in all forms....the list goes on and on. And my mom said I was never interested growing up! Maybe that is what I needed....

I am way more sentimental:
I collect it all. Everything. Move stubbs, baseball tickets, programs, CDs....it's ridiculous. Hence my need to start a scrapbook. I have boxes of stuff. I also want others to be sentimental. I send lots of cards. This is fun, and I think people like it. If they don't, they don't say so.

So these are the things that are different. Now I am off to pack for our super cool anniversary trip to San Antonio to see Shamu!! It's our San Antonaversary!

Blisters or Comfort?

I am trapped. I have reached the point in my teaching career where I am considering buying not-as-cute-but-very-comfortable shoes. I swore to myself I would never reach this point. I will not be the teacher wearing crocs (product placement) as dress shoes. I will not be the teacher that looks really dressed up until you see her tennis shoes sticking out from under her dress. (Oh trust me, it happens.)

But I still have this problem. Some of my heels are just so cute. But just so painful. I have tried to trade off. I wear heels one day, then flats the next. But as we enter the summer time...I have noticed all of my dressy sandals are heels. This proposes a dilema. Do I buy the ugly brown sandals and walk on air? Or do I ice my feet, suck it up and pretend I am on "Sex in the City"?

I just don't know.

Get off your cell phone!

Driving in Dallas is quite interesting. People are crazy and just plain dumb. There are crazy drivers, bad drivers, and just really wreckless drivers. But to the already horrible driving, we add one awful, damaging thing. A cell phone.

Don't get me wrong, I love the cell phone. I talk on it....I text. I am down with the cell phone. But I do NOT talk on it when I drive. If I have to, I pick it up, tell the person I will call them back, and GO BACK TO DRIVING.

Driving recently, I can tell who is on their cell phones by their driving. They are the ones driving 55 and swerving. They are the ones going 60 in the fast lane. They are the ones driving half-way on the shoulder with their left turning signal still flashing. As I drive past them, I can see they are on their cell phone! And if its not a cell phone, it's a cigarette in one hand or a small dog in their lap. I mean really. Really? You might get in a wreck because you want your dog to see out the window? That is just silly.

Every once in a while, I am wrong. I say to my self "she is on a cell phone". And when I drive by there is not one...so I think "okay, just an idiot."

Parking Space Snob

I have recently discovered something about myself. I am a Parking Space Snob. I admit it. I will not park and walk. I will drive around until I find one that is semi-close, or until someone pulls out so that I may take their spot. This drives Ryan crazy! He just parks. Considering that he drives most of the time we go anywhere together....this causes us to disagree.
"Wait, there is one!"
"No, that has to have one of those hatchbacks in it. We will just park back here."
"No! There has to be one closer. Don't park here."
"Babe, this one is fine. By the time we find a closer one, we would have been inside."
"But think of walking all the way out with our groceries and stuff...it will be worth it."

Guess which one is me?

And then I like to bookend the conversation by finding the closer spots on the way in and saying "Ryan, why didn't you park here?".

So for all of you Parking Slot Snobs out there, stay strong. I am on your side.

Welcome to Dallas life!

Tales of an Engagement awaiting a big transition (for me)

#1 "Traffic."

Ryan is very versitile. He has lived in New Orleans, Corpus Christi, Houston once, Dubai (overseas), Houston again, Edmond and now Dallas. But that is beside the point. I, however, am another story. Ryan has traveled the world. Seen it all. I have seen pretty little in comparison. Not that I am complaining. I love my life. I have loved the family trips to New York, Branson, Orlando, Hawaii, etc. They were all great. But I am not nearly as versitile as Ryan. Not even close. I have always lived in or right by Edmond, OK.

As I approach the big move, I can't help but try to make my transition easier. I went to see Ryan this weekend, and I have been to Dallas a lot, but this time, I drove and ran errands, in order to prepare myself for life there. However, I want to tell a few little stories about the traffic there.

First of all, I am a good driver. I ain't bad! I try. But in Edmond, likely if you need to change lanes, there is not a car there. You can weave in and out, not that I do, but you can drive and be happy and not worry about wrecks, cause there are just fewer cars in Edmond. There are hours were it is dead around here. In Dallas, it is like night and day. There are cars. And then another one, times a million. People drive really fast and they are just dumb! They will pull over on the "side" of the road,when there are two lanes in a constructions zone, and almost cause a 5 car pile up and then go on with their day. They will bully you on the road for fun. It's pretty insane.

I was driving in Dallas to go to Walmart. To me, Walmart is a haven. You go there and there are few people there. Not in Dallas! I went at 1pm, on a Monday, on a short trip and wound up waiting for 15 minutes to even leave. AFTER I had found everything I wanted. Which was not much. The express lane had the longest line I had ever seen. The Self check out was filled with people buying 1,000 pillows and everything they could ever need to move into a brand new apartment. I thought people used the self checkout when they wanted to get out of their car and run in and then leave.

It is just incredibly different then what I am used to. I am thinking right now I might go to Walmart up on I-35 and 15th, just to have some peace! I really think I will.

One more thing about Dallas. You make a stupid turn or get in the wrong lane, and you have to take 3 U-turns to take back your dumbness. It makes for some funny stories. Those will come later. I am tired.

Ron's Auto Shop

Let me tell you a story about a typical Kelly family vacation. This was our first vacation where we included Ryan, and boy, was it interesting. Our lovely Dodge caravan just could not take another trip. I actually cannot remember the last time we took a driving trip where we didn't have van trouble. Anyway, so we are driving along in Branson, MO, and my Dad sees the "Service Engine Soon" light. He calls the dealer, which isn't open and after a few phone calls we get connected with Ron's Auto Shop, who says they will work on it. Cool. So we head there, and it is a house. A blue house with a guy named John with a blue shirt wide open and a Love tattoo on his right peck. Yum. He says he can fix it, but he has to get the parts. And so begins our wild goose chase to make it to the show we had bought tickets to and rent a car, because we can't drive ours. John lets my parents take his car to go rent US a car.....and it is a old 80s looking-red convertable with the words "Fear This" across the windshield. The image of my parents in the "Fear This" convertable is the best thing I have ever seen. What a trip.